CleanUp in the Produce Aisle

Cleanup in the Produce Aisle
by Minnakoda
Pairin': J/B

OM effin' god! This girl(who by the way has become one of my good friends on Twitter), has got her way with makin' a vegetable or fruit so damn temptin' and erotic. I catagorize this o/s as crackfic straight from the depths of hell! I was laughin' so hard as she described someone doin' nasty things to inatimate objects. Here let me give ya a little bit of her story:

I heard her moan, and watched as she fondled the peaches, slowly bringing one up to her face and rubbing it against her cheek. She inhaled deeply, seeming to savour their scent as I carefully increased the intensity of the hunger and lust which I was sending at her. I watched, captivated as her lips slowly closed around the fruit and she took a bite. Juices dribbled down her chin, and I resisted the sudden urge to walk over and lick the sickly sweet smelling liquid off of her as it dribbled down her neck. I knew it would taste disgusting, no matter what it smelt like; human food always tasted like cardboard.

My eyes followed the trail of juice down her neck and I felt my pants tighten as her throat bobbed slightly, swallowing the fruit. Hmm, I had better keep focused; I don't normally feel the emotions I send to others so strongly.

But what got me laughin' the most was my commandin' officer*snickers at his embarassment*. While tryin' to hide from this unknown brunette who is throwin' off some major sad vibes, he decides to play a little game. First is the peaches, then the banana, and lastly a tomato.

My commandin' officer blames it on his alter ego, but he becomes highly aroused by the scene playin' out in front of his eyes, yep in comes the grocery basket just to hide the painful erection.*sighs at thought's of his ragin' erection, earnin' a glare from The Major*

This o/s was turned into a multi-chapter fic called Dark Temptation, which is highly recommendable for for those who enjoy shoppin' a little more than they should.

In Dark Temptation, there were many things I didn't understand(hence all the tweets askin' questions) but I did get through all of her chapters. It's wonderfully written with angst and drama galore. And, even the mention of a three-some *maybe I can get her to write that lemon, gives my girl the puppy dog eyes*, probably she won't. Anyways, I'm gettin' the glare again for usin' The Majors computer again.

"Hey, this was YOUR idea...not mine. Ya, know if ya didn't growl so much ya probably wouldn't have a problem with that ragin' hard on. Again, YOUR fault that is so damn sexy!" *ducks for cover from The Major* *whispers "Shit, I'm in trouble"*

Signin' off,

Sgt. TittyKickers